One of those rare academic articles delivered as a poem: Brodey waxing lyrical about family therapy.

A family is a growing thing,

Sit and watch the rhythms of

its dance,

An Analyst, who tries to

read the system

of exchange.

And they too shift

and change before one’s eyes, as

tempers flare and angry eyebrows

Flatten into hurt feelings as one asks:

“Is every one in this

family angry—or have

you no language to

separate anger from wanting to reach out,

and meet again.”

And some families

never meet, and,

contact is a thing

they long to have. And so

they substitute words

and signs and symbols—

Hollow lectures to

adolescent children

which the therapist

records and plays

back the recording.

And father

listens

to his voice

While he hears

mother

gently crying

and really asked by father’s eyes,

She gives corrective information:

“I could not tell you

what an ass you have

become—

Pulpiting

my boys.” And father replies:

“I was not aware”

And father, children

even therapist feel

the living affection

waiting in this

family group,

drifted apart

in a circle of

father’s work:

he doesn’t know

the children:

nor listen:

so they are no

fun:

He doesn’t tell

them: and his

wife takes over:

not because she

wants to.

She’s Aggressive Dominant type,”

the psychologist

said—

But he is too, at his

office and at home

the more he

reached for closeness the

more

afraid

of:

no she needed

only his

money

to

raise

the

boys.

Contact: That’s a

whole theory.

Out of contact is

of course psychotic

or preoccupied

by inner workings—

Privacy is

necessary.

But in contact

what do I mean.

In contact

means to acting with

eyes linked

in hate love

indifference.

A family therapist

is not in favor of

divorce or

marriage.

He is in favor

of a family

being aware

of its own

existence

Not as what

should be, but what it is now.

The Should-be Family is

out of contact

With what?

Each other as they

pass through time,

or stages of development.

A baby still at seven,

he wets his bed.

“He shouldn’t doctor

what should I do?”

And a dried-up father

sits by muttering

his Aphorisms like

prayers waiting for

responsive readings

from his children.

One pee’s his bed

The other slicks

his hair back

sweet and

does the way he

“ought to” for his friends.

There’s a piece of

classification. The

Should and Ought-to

families who

raise the Doctor to

his Dais—to

judge or gentle

super ego

masochistic

compulsive

tendencies.

It’s all his fault

the family always

knew and

whatever the

Doctor says is

just to verify!

The doctor who

is a family therapist

listens.

He comments to

The family in his

room, on their

system of operation

He delights in bringing to the family’s

awareness

Its non-verbal gestures which

defeat and contradict and cross.

And silent fists are

heard in father’s slowly

rhythmed gentle tones

and the boy’s hate

twists his mouth

while he answers yes.

The family therapist

is a communications

expert. He must

get through.

Translate from

one generation to

another.

No, not interpret

but make them

aware they speak

a different

language.

The Americanized

Puerto Rican boy

may have no

family that understands except

his own gang—

his brothers

The parents are

police.

And gangs

make

feelings that are

strong enough to

be like what they

were in another

generation. At home.

Put them there

before you Papa

Mama Joe the

Kid

And analyze their

system

Their contact

with each other

and where it

broke down. As a family.

So there’s one

kind of family that’s

healthier and another

that’s more sick.

yes! Socially

why not, but there’s

Different styles of living

and

educating kids

For different

ways of living in

a different kind of

worlds.

Now if you want it simple

categorize linear style:

There’s one way that's

best. And one’s

mature, and one’s the cause—

a kind of germ—The ma

who done it

to

Schizophrenic

Panics. They

all have

Simple names.

But they are not

simple people.

And who’s the

most productive?

Each culture

has its system

And split level

paper thin

houses rhythm

a family’s

biology

and

change

the

culture.

A visit to the home

will open a therapist

to the bedroom story

of props

and who takes out the garbage.

The Family Therapist

knows the biological

world– Territoriality

is not a strange word.

Crowd people up and

the stink and noise

gets them unless

trained to it.

A family trains

its

kids to be Artists

Schizophrenics

And good guys

How?

Try to understand the family

while it’s still going on.

Work with a family.

Watch a family together

as they teach the littlest

one how far in your

office they can

Roam. How far to stand apart.

Do they breathe

Italian or

Pennsylvania

style.

The upper class family

sits at my desk

sharpening my

pencils and the

lower class kids

overawed don’t

say much and it’s

not that they are quiet.

The parents taught them long ago

“Why won’t you talk?” the parents

say.

But with kids I’m

glad the parents are there

I don’t need their secrets

I just want to know

what’s going on.

They tell me by their actions

what they don’t know in words.

Usually their

fighting–

crescendo builds

contagion

they want

me to decide whose right

I say

“You don’t even understand

what you are saying

in your household–

a tower of babble

crazy mixed up

talk.

Let’s stop!

What did your

wife mean. She

said “you don’t

understand and you all

defend

without

listening.”

The therapist listens softly

they talk to each other

She says

“He’s like driving a

car without

a destination.”

“I always get the shopping done”

Is he passive?

She defends her destination

by a list of

notes–yes she

brings them to the

hour to know what to say.

And her husband remarks

“I let her run the

house” but he

doesn’t

nothing works.

Now how does

this family operate

so as to avoid

anything but

misery. That

takes Art.

The Family

Therapist may

be joined in

his curiosity by the husband.

The children learn a new perspec-

tive—

Mother’s ways are odd. So what?

Father agrees with what they thought.

At last.

The therapist has no

place as the

sick child supporter

or the Dutch Uncle

He is not a family

Counselor or a

marriage Counselor

This is psychiatric

business with an organization.

If you

don’t from the

first speak to a

family as a

whole you’re

lost!

“What do I mean?—

Johnny stutters, doctor,

shall I bring him in,” she

says to the phone

“Bring in the whole family”

“Grandma too?”

“Of course—she lives with you?”

“You say

live

She

runs

the

house.”

Watch what this family

does with its language

—makes noises with

words and speaks

so the boy if he

tries to say

anything

is in the middle of

a breath

well it’s all just

wrong!

Learning language

is an intricate

affair—the

Rhythm is wrong

they jerk in their

dance nothing

flows. Mama

taught him

to speak so

he wouldn’t be

like father.

The more intricate

learnings must

be taught

by example.

Teach a child

to be Honest

as a Virtue—a little crook

Tell the little girl

to beware of strangers—she

pays attention to the shadiest

characters.

In the Family therapy

you watch the problem

in process the

children being

taught and teaching

their parents to

be sick or well.

Researchers

no longer have to

use their symbolic

logic and infer

and infer

Watch castration

in process—father looking daggers at

son stroking mama’s leg for comfort.

Watch the girl

being primed for

an accident which

will need an abortion

And don’t be

ashamed

to refer to mamma’s

own secret

feelings. Shh. they are known

family secrets

make sense

out of so much

the children have

partly learned

at last

learning

is

acknowledged,

Even if still unsaid.

“It’s too personal

When you are

older

I will

say

it.”

At last.

It’s in the

open

it’s a

secret.

What is the process of

Family Treatment:

A Family works at

its problems together

Papa selected Ma

because she seemed

right to him—intuition

love

A kind of matching that

can reinforce

Problems or Assets

of the last generation.

A new foreground

Background shuffle.

It isn’t just addition

or Averaging.

This couple when they

meet each other

just explode into

feelings which

elope with them

Sensible enough.

And the way they organize

Their children

Program them

Before they learn

to talk and later

is different than

a group of friends

or of patients

even when they

select each other.

Marriage is a

different kind of

selection.

They say married people get

to look alike.

Child rearing is

Information exchange

And Contact is between

the way your children

are and the way

that you and your parents

organized each other.

A little of the message sent returns

to correct the next bit so

It can approach

correct

its error

contact

Cybernetics, Ethology, Information

Theory

Analysis

converge.

The process of

family treatment

is making aware

what is so accommodated, or

so intrinsically repetitive

as to be unknown to

yourself but not the

other.

The therapist’s work is contact. They

meet each other and themselves

and they may

decide that they

couldn’t care less

and disengage.

Only one thing to say

more and I must

stop and summarize.

The Aztecs didn’t

bury their garbage

for the Archeologists

to find, The Rain

dancers don’t make

with phallic symbols

Their feet

just dance

Retrospective theory

that says a family

is this way because they

want to accomplish

some purpose, is a perspective

in the mind of the

observer, which

makes sense

for journal presentations.

The nuance of the therapeutic

artist as he opens outward

To touch a new unknown

Stirs the creativity of the

family’s world

Watch a family, work with

one

Why has family therapy been

avoided

in the past

Remember it’s man’s

first institution.

Look what happened

when a single man

was analyzed

inside

by

Freud.

No! who studies

intercourse between

two people and their family

institution.

It’s too damn close

to home!

Too damn simple

that’s why it makes

you anxious,

I am a man my

skin is my boundary

don’t you know!

A signal emitter a

receiver a feedback

circuit. A system

of emission, input

put it in, smell, sound,

light vibrations,

tissue. No!

How mechanical

can you get!

And changing over

time—regenerating

one generation to the

next No!

No it all ends with

me Do individual therapy.

Family therapy spans

the generations

makes its unit

a living organ

made of

living cells,

What!

A family has a skin

its own kind of filter

Any daughter-in-law

will tell you.

Obsolescence is the curse

of Orthodoxy

Family Therapy opens

A new way of

moving out

It presents a

psychology of

growth

of multiplying

self reinforcement

Two people

catching fire

create

learning children

coded

beyond either

ones

control.

A family is a living

thing,

a creature,

spanning

time.

And of the

families I

have worked

with

Some are glad

I have come

So close

to

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